Joke of the day.

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Breaking news: The Prince of Qatar is now flying to Zurich to thank Sepp Blatter from FIFA in person and return his daughter to him safe and unharmed

That would be funny except they blew 45 million on wining, dining,these corrupt a#@#holes
 
" the dog is truly mans best friend? not convinced put your dog and your wife in the boot of your car for an hour, when you open it see who's happy to see ya"
 
Life Saving technique............

Two hillbillies walk into a restaurant. While having a bite to eat, they talk about their moonshine operation.

Suddenly, a woman at a nearby table, who is eating a sandwich, begins to cough. After a minute or so, it becomes apparent that she is in real distress.
...
One of the hillbillies looks at her and says, 'Kin ya swallar?'

The woman shakes her head no. Then he asks, 'Kin ya breathe?'

The woman begins to turn blue and shakes her head no.

The hillbilly walks over to the woman, lifts up her dress, yanks down her panties and quickly gives her right butt cheek a lick with his tongue.

The woman is so shocked that she has a violent spasm and the obstruction flies out of her mouth.

As she begins to breathe again, the Hillbilly walks slowly back to his table.
His partner says,............. 'Ya know, I'd heerd of that there 'Hind Lick Maneuver' but I ain't niver seed nobody do it!'
-------------------------------------------------------
 
Dad,whats the difference between a pussy and a c&*t? a young son asks.
Look at this,says dad as he lifts the sheets on the boys sleeping naked mother.
Thats a pussy son.
Its wonderfull dad,can i touch it?
No son,says dad.
If you touch the pussy you"ll wake the c*&t up.
 
Dad,whats the difference between a pussy and a c&*t? a young son asks.
Look at this,says dad as he lifts the sheets on the boys sleeping naked mother.
Thats a pussy son.
Its wonderfull dad,can i touch it?
No son,says dad.
If you touch the pussy you"ll wake the c*&t up.

LMAO But thats wrong in so many ways
 
This will only mean something to those who know Morwell and understand the type of place Morwell is but here goes anyway.


It has been reported that due to recent land slippages along the Princess Highway 25% of the township of Morwell has fallen into the Hazelwood Open Cut Mine.

RTL are calling for volunteers to help.....with the other 75%!
 
It has been reported that due to recent land slippages along the Princess Highway 25% of the township of Morwell has fallen into the Hazelwood Open Cut Mine.

RTL are calling for volunteers to help.....with the other 75%!

:sarcastic::sarcastic::sarcastic::sarcastic: Hahahah
 
love the excuse at the end.....

A US man has been charged for barking at a police dog outside a bar in the US state of Ohio.

Police were investigating a car accident outside the bar in the town of Mason on Sunday when they heard the dog barking frantically from inside their patrol car, NY Daily News reports.

When they went to investigate they allegedly found 25-year-old Ryan James Stephens teasing the dog, called Timber, by barking and hissing at it through the window.

Police officer Bradley Walker said Stephens appeared highly intoxicated.

Walker asked Stephens why he was barking to which he allegedly replied: "the dog started it".

Man charged for barking at police dog
 
A joke just for Sqeake.

Whats the difference between Iron man and Iron woman ?

Iron man is a "Superhero". Iron woman is a simple instruction.
 
I bumped into a few Japanese tourists today who asked me to take a photo of them.

When I said "wave" they all ran like !@#$.
 

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